Boy do I feel like I have been getting tested lately. My phone first fell. Then stopped working. Then really stopped working. I had a job that told me I couldn’t come back until I had a working phone. Boy was I stressed. And in the big picture, it’s just a phone that will get replaced. Not to mention when I took it to get fixed, they were like, “oh we’re not sure if it’ll actually work after we fix the screen. ” As he zipped my phone away to get fixed I had a gut feeling, it wasn’t going to work. But I let them fix it anyway with the hopes of having a phone.
Sure enough it wasn’t fixed when he told me to come pick it up. I was so frustrated because I had this part- time job I really wanted and me not having a phone was putting me in a really bad situation with the new part -time I landed. They told me I couldn’t come back unless my phone was fixed. So I real-eyes-ed this may not work out with this new job opportunity due to all the runaround with my phone. I was bummed and it was so much more than just my phone not working. So I tried to make peace with myself and the job that if I ended up not getting it, that I would be okay and it must be it wasn’t meant to be.
The next day, I walked into apple trying to make peace with that too. I told myself, if they can’t fix my phone, it’s okay.. don’t worry. I’ll just get a new phone when I can get a new phone. Luckily got my phone to work. Whooh Hooh! So I immediately texted the new job. She took a whole day to get back to me so I was already thinking this isn’t a good sign.
Sure enough, when she texted me it was that she had decided to go with someone else. (your intuition really doesn’t lie to you.) This sucked big time and it was hard for me because I had really wanted this position. I cried a lot that day because the loss hurt. But to be honest, if it wasn’t for me it’s not for me. If it was for me it would have been for me. And I am okay with that. It didn’t feel good at first. Nor did it feel good even after I made peace with it all.
I will say that after making peace with it all, once I felt all the emotions of the disappointment, etc. I was able to process it all and let it go with ease over a short period of time. It’s really all perspective anyway right?
My thought process was: 1. This is nowhere near a huge disappointment compared to real big disappointments I have experienced in the past. 2. This simply means, it wasn’t for me. Something else is and this wasn’t mine. And that’s okay.
Little by little you can think of the positives more and more. For instance, I then started thinking about how I may be able to take that trip to India in November after all. I thought about how grateful I was to have my phone fixed, but also how grateful I was for my time away from my phone. I also took extra time to genuinely appreciate my family as me not having a phone brought me closer to them. I was FaceTiming them from my computer everyday, which I rarely ever video chat them, and it made me feel so close to home. There were definitely positives about this situation. Not to mention the time to work on my projects such as this blog site.
What I love about life and living in the present moment, is every new moment is a whole new opportunity to change the lens of how you view things. You can do this now. You can ponder on what all the positives are and switch your perspective right here, literally creating a real conscious shift within your being. You can focus on ways to give yourself the self-care you may have been put in this predicament to deal with.
I found through this particular lesson I learned this week, amongst other times with this same lesson, that it is best to step back when we are feeling overstressed. Take care of our needs. Feeling stressed is really just a way of our bodies asking ourselves for some attention. Maybe what we need from ourselves is time, rest, relaxation, quiet, time out in nature simply connecting.. etc. It could be anything that your soul is asking you for in the moments of stress. Listen to it because it needs you right at that moment. Give yourself what you need. This is something one of my favorite therapists named Samantha used to tell me. She was so right! “Give yourself what you need right now.”
Thanks for listening and for taking care of yourselves. You should give yourself a kiss in the mirror right now and tell yourself how much you love yourself. Or do so while give yourself a hug… We need touch and love and encouragement from ourselves too sometimes. xoxo